Updated: Apr 7
There is no right or wrong way to make decisions. We were taught as children that decisions had to be either right or wrong leading to a good or bad result.
All decisions will have gain and loss components. If you choose option A, then you lose option B. We should way up the advantages and disadvantages, the gains and losses of each option. We then need to accept the loss component and let go of it.
Or we can find an option C. For example: I had planned to study all day Sunday to finally get some assignments done. I love to rock climb and boulder and I hadn’t been for about 2 months due to my workload and studies. Now I could have taken option A and studied all day or I could have taken option B and gone climbing instead because it was a beautiful day to climb outdoors. But instead I chose option C, I decided to go to the local indoor bouldering centre and boulder for 2 hours, then return home to my studies. Problem solved.
Many people, especially in management ranks, believe that decisions must be made quickly. This is really not the case. Most times decisions do not have to be made immediately. It is always better to allow time to think of the concern before handing down a conclusion. Sometimes even NO decision is acceptable short term.
Many folks cause themselves undue negative stressful emotions due to the pressure they place upon themselves about deciding. Like I say in my workshops and courses “RELAAAAAAX”
Many times, a great deal of weight is placed on the logic of decision making and often times folks make selections based on that logic and disregard what their gut tells them. The gut feeling or intuition should always pay a big part in the decision-making process.
One technique I teach is the Analytical Meditation. This is where students first relax the body and focus the mind. They bring the mind down from the busy agitated Beta brain wave state to the calmer more focused and organised Alpha brain wave state.
Then using visualisation, the student unpacks the concern looking at all the positive and negative aspects of all the options. They think about the gains and losses of each option and maybe introduce other options into the equation.
Thereafter they will sit and ask the intuitive self “How should I decide?” And sit quietly and wait. When the mind is calm and focused enough the answer will come. It may not come in the first sitting but eventually it will come.
Always use this rule of thumb in regards to your behaviours, decisions and actions. I heard the great Zig Ziglar once say: Would you be happy to read about your decision or action in tomorrow’s news?” This will definitely help you stay on the straight and narrow.
Adrian Spear – Mindfulness Trainer & Counsellor: www.apspear.com